White anyone?

If you are looking for something fresh and crisp to wear this summer, think no further!  Just opt for something white! With the fall shadowing upon us, it's essential that we finish out the summer brightly before we must transition into autumn colors. 

White White White White White White White!!!!!!

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why white?

-Besides the authoritative color of black, white is the opposing color that helps us look just as sharp, but in a soft and subtle way

-Its pallid element repels the sun, enabling us to stay cool and comfortable in hotter weather

-Consisting of an achromatic and neutral hue, it pairs with any accessory we may already have in our wardrobe, saving us a shopping trip

-If you gravitate toward metallics you are sure to shine with this ivory base

And lastly, if you want to make an impression of confidence, honesty, innocence, and purity for a first date or a social event, then WHITE IS YOUR SHADE!!!

End

Striving toward a Bliss life!!!

Anita AKA Aniyah The MommySavior

 

Is Death the End? My Hope

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             I pondered upon whether my spirit will stay after my physical remains have left this earth.  These are the questions I asked myself:

Questions

-Are we locked into a dreamlike state?

-Who is the gatekeeper of our souls?

-Who decides our fate?

-Do we transcend into another place?

-Does our soul go into limbo between worlds?

-Do we take up a permanent residence in the heavens, or woefully in hell?

-What truly happens to us?

It dawned on me that the answer to these questions may remain a mystery.

   My Hope

My hope is that we can somehow communicate with the living albeit even if it is simply to give them comfort after our death.

My hope is that we transition into a utopian atmosphere where we reunite with our ancestors.

My hope is that our fears, pain, and anguish dissipate.

My hope is that all our atrocious deeds are forgiven.

My hope is that our memory reminds others how sacred our short stay on this planet was, however not in vain.

These are my hopes. What are your questions for the end, and what are your hopes?

 End

Aniyah: The MommySavior -" Time is the only commodity"

 

To Wig or not To Wig

Candid View

I recently had a compelling conversation with a male figure (we will call him Edgar) whom I happen to love and respect. What I had not realized prior to our candid talk was that our point of view was extremely contrasting, specifically when it came to the black (women) experience. 

Edgar (a black male) had expressed that he wanted to start a campaign against black women wearing wigs/fake hair. His belief was that they wore the artificial hair due to a lack of self-love.

His opinion was of conviction and creed, so I had to disarm myself in ordered to be opened to heeding to his position. After patiently receiving his message, my vigor came out because it was time for my voice to be heard. 

My Sentiment

 I began by validating some of his mass statements, then I countered by rhetorically asking:

Are you aware that the traditional images of white woman in our society are an illusion filled with trick lighting, flattering poses, and nowadays are also enhanced with photoshop software?

Did you know that hair coloring is exponentially higher for white woman and many other ethnic groups as opposed to black women?

Have you thought of the possibility that black women are not the only group who gravitate toward adorning their hair with extensions?

Since most of us can agree that yes, photos are touched up and Caucasian women have traditionally colored their hair, particularly blonde more often than women of color; I decided to expand by focusing on wigs and extensions. 

I let the questions marinate so he could ponder upon them, then I elaborated with a few sources to share my logic:   

Extensions

Unfortunately, Bad hair days happen to us girls far too often. Either because the weather did not agree with our do, we were in-between washes, or simply because we did not have the time for the flat iron that morning! Due to this reality, we usually accepted that we cannot measure up to the ideal idolized “perfect woman” with the cultivated hair and body!  

Spoiler Alert: That image that we might have been admiring on the latest cover of Elle magazine may just be a little deceitful! That perfect body, tan and luxurious hair are all made up so that we could spend money on beauty products, making worthy the media’s advertising dollars! Yep, we have bought into the illusion!

According to pro hairstylist Priscilla Valles, an estimated 97 percent of female celebrities regularly rely on faux hair pieces to lengthen and pump up their natural look (Daily Mail.com).

 In addition, newly released hair extension statistics (Hairtrade.com) divulged that almost 90% of women who wear extensions keep them a secret from friends and family, and 34% of them use hair extensions on a regular basis. 

More than three quarters of those polled (76%) said that they wore extensions to add volume, with other reasons for wearing them including a desire to look more glamorous, the ability to change your style quickly and the fact they could be applied at home.

This group consisted of not only blacks, but other groups as well.

 Wigs
Yes, wigs are popular in the black community for some of the same reasons other groups wear extensions.  To confess some black women, have hair issues or have succumbed to the ideology that long, fine hair is better, however let us not jump to judgement so quickly, because not every black woman agrees with this line of thinking.

 Wig Advantages for black women
 Many of us (yep, I have a whole collection of wigs myself) simply want the versatility the wig brings to our style, appreciate the low maintenance, enjoy saving time, see the advantage of protecting our own natural hair, also identify it as a great solution to grow out a bad or short haircut. These are all practical reasons black women may opt for a wig.

 So let the truth be told, many women of various nationalities invest in their appearance for a variety of reasons. So, before it is decided to bash black women for wearing wigs, let us gather the facts which will reveal that it is not just a BLACK THING, but it is a WOMEN THING!

 End

Aniyah AKA The MommySavior
"Making it count" Aniyah
 

Are you Ready for the Summer?

Hey ladies, in my last post I shared the color palette to get you ready for spring and summer along with a few nice picks. In case you have forgotten your color palette, I've included it at this end of this post! Now it's time to really get you geared up for the upcoming summer months!  

Let's not worry about those few extra hibernation pounds we've gained. Once we start moving again, some of those pounds are sure to shed anyway!! (At least I hope. LOL).  The good news is that regardless of that extra storage space on our bodies, a flattering silhouette is sure to please the eye!!!

So check out my latest picks for your summer silhouette.  Enjoy comfort, style, all at relatively affordable prices!  Now who can say no to all of those elements?

Also, due to your feedback, I've included the shopping links for your convenience! Please note that all styles may not be available, but you are sure to find a similar style on the site.  

These styles work well with most body types. I think you will especially enjoy my plus size picks; so I will start off with plus size! All of my plus size selections are from the brand Eloquii.  Enjoy:)

https://www.eloquii.com 

https:// www. lightinthebox.com

https://www.zulily.com/

https://anniecloth.com/

_______________________________________________________________________________

 

https://www.lightinthebox.com             

     https://zolucky.com

   

    So ladies that sums up my picks for you! 

    Stay tuned for my must have tips on how to look and feel youthful, regardless of your age!!! 

    Anita, AKA Aniyah: The Mommysavior

   "Today is the best gift I can receive" Aniyah

___________________________________________________________________________

   As promised, here's your color palette for spring/summer 2021:

Stepping Out in Style: Spring 2021

    

Spring Fever

Now who doesn't have Spring Fever this 2021?  Look around at friends, family, and colleagues; they all have something in common: AGITATION!  We have all been such good boys and girls by following quarantine protocols, but now it's time to strut our stuff (safely of course)!  

Blossoming Flowers

With Covid-19 restrictions loosening up we are seeing many flock to the restaurants, malls and even theaters. What is left behind is the agony and angst that we have endured from hibernating indoors. Spring forward to the long anticipated luminous days being unveiled through the vision of the blossoming flowers: Lilies, Tulips, Yoshino cherry, Winter Hazel, and Siberian Squill.  With this flourishment comes a plethora of shades to canvas our spring apparel, but ladies have you taken inventory? Is your wardrobe ready for the spring?

Be in the Now with these few fresh spring colors and looks that I've picked out to brighten up your mood and get you going in style! 

                          

               

  Yellow Tulip

Whether you are meeting the girls for lunch or simply browsing 

at your local mall, gaining traction in this super comfy yellow tulip 

cotton blend will give you effortless style this spring! 

                          

                                                                                  

                              

  Begonia Orange flower  

  Dazzle like a Begonia when  you step out

 for work or play in a Dodo Bar Or vibrant 

 orange shirt dress!  

This number has both comfort& style.  

 Switch from your day pumps, or  kitten heels 

  to evening wedges or stilettos

 and be ready  for that after work meet up!

                

                  

        Pink Lily

     Bud like a Pink Calle Lily 

     in a bold fuchsia tone, 

     which flatters almost         

     every complexion!

                    

  Now if you're not sure what colors to mix and match, 

here's the rest of the color palette for spring: 

With all of these options to choose from it's hard not to get excited! So let's get back out there with a glimmering eye and buoyant view in our gleaming garments! But remember to keep it safe:)

End..

Aniyah AKA TheMommySavior

"Living every moment with cognitive intention" AI

Who Am I? In the Workplace Amid Covid 19

Frantic Employees 

   Many of us are frantic and almost desperate when it comes to employment amid Covid 19. We have become a lagoon of dispensable beings in the eyes of many employers. Social distancing has caused management to opt into work from home platforms, downsizing, and a reduction in salaries. The companies who have been able to hire are cautious to offer permanent employment, or are significantly reducing the pay rate and amount of new hires. 

Subsequently, these actions have effected not just earning potential for many workers, but also job security.  Specifically the retail and hospitality industry laborers have been hit the hardest.  In contrast, the medical sector, e-commerce, delivery services, and the grocery industries have seen a surge in business.  

 Despite the growing concerns about our professional futures, we should refuse to be cornered into settling for less. I have always prided myself for my tenacity, but after an amiss encounter I began to question my position in the job market.  Below is an account of  my recent experience that ensued due to my Covid 19 lay off.  This is my first hand account on how working in a declining job market and accepting indigent terms can become unrewarding, and literally decompose your spirit!  

 The dream Job

After being discouraged by the lack of job prospects following my job lay off, I reluctantly accepted an administrative job assignment that I was overqualified for at a semi-profitable financial company on a temporary to permanent basis.   The recruiter Kate pitched it as a dream job.  She rambled on that I'd be entering a friendly small family business that was obdurately surviving despite recent events.  Endless opportunities would be available due to the small basin of talent at the establishment.  Kate also insisted that my work day would be full of excitement, perks, and a progressive culture.  Her pitch had me dashing to sign on the dotted line!

  Good Old Nepotism 

    A few months at my post and I discovered that the excitement was actually idleness, the perks were reserved for the nepotistic pool. What was guaranteed was that I'd become penalized for stepping on the wrong cousins' toes!  Every meeting I attended, every memo received, and every interaction with the people upstairs resulted in a feeling of ineptness, powerlessness, agitation, because my input was discouraged.  Stares in the employee lounge, whispers in the community lunch zone, and abrupt responses from management alerted me that my go getter attitude was uninvited.  I was to stay in my place and let the big folks stir the pot!   Oh and the progressive culture full of opportunities; I soon discovered that I wouldn't be entitled to securing those opportunities unless I was fortunate enough to attract a family member at the establishment to wed.  

                                                     My New Reality 

Consequently my enthusiasm turned to indifference when I realized that I had to keep showing up everyday, and of course my daily 6am alarm clock remined me of my new reality.  I started to ponder on how I'd relinquish myself from the trap I walked into. 

                                                      The Mirage

A turning point occurred one quiet Tuesday morning during the end of my six month tenure on the job,  I had an outer body experience:

 A mirage opened up aloft my desk.  My body began to float amid the opening.  I was suspended into air looking down at my cramped desk,  glancing at my co-workers whose faces were cemented to their computer screens in a trance like state, then I turned to the cleaning staff  whom was methodically dusting desks while simultaneously collecting the trash. A birds eye view allowed me to snoop into an operation manager's office;  where I was able to witness a mid-level agent sighing in her seat while she was being reprimanded for her substandard performance. 

What each subject in my illusion had in common was a discontent for their routines, because they felt caged in the structure that accommodated hundreds of their peers. Chronic nine to fivers who had become numb, bored, and frustrated.  Their ill feelings would one day lead to grievance, resentment, and before long apathy.

                                                      Women in the Workforce

  By September 2020, 865,000 women exited the workforce for many reasons resulting from the pandemic (Forbes Advisor).   In opposition and prior to the outbreak, in 2019 fifty five percent of the female population were gainfully employed (www.statista.com).  The robust employment in 2019 was partly due to the establishment of the technology age, which had catapulted women into the workforce.    

Notwithstanding our current crisis in order for families to survive and efficiently run their households two incomes are still a necessary component.  So the question I asked myself was: Who am I today in the workplace?  This question resonated in my mind for some time.  I thought to myself: Well outside of the office I am a mom, a daughter, a sister, and a romantic mate. These are the titles that I have become accustomed to.  What I really couldn't articulate was who I was in the workplace, which has become a consequence of the post Covid 19 devastation. My identity, like many other women and men has simply become obscure. 

                                                          Self Discovery

Preceding 2020 I had acted in posts that I sincerely enjoyed.  At those posts I wore a plethora of hats and my value permeated amongst my colleagues.  Those accolades all came to a standstill abruptly due to the disruption of the plague of 2020. 

While at the financial company,  It dawned on me that my career would continue to plummet like a whirlpool during a tornado if I didn't do something about it.  The consequence of not acting would result in me embodying a zombie like state like my co-workers in the mirage.  The solution to my dilemna was to rise above my circumstance and act swiftly.  I had to confront myself and find the answer to the question Who am I in the workplace today?  

                                                          My Homework

My homework consisted of the inception of me defining what I wanted out of  a job, considering my skills, experience, natural talents, and than later researching industries that supported my work ethics.  The professional characteristics I possess: tech savvy, creative/artistic, goal oriented, diligent, efficient,  outgoing, and a team player.  The industries whom could use my talents: e-commerce-sales/distribution, pharmaceuticals, medical support, supply chain industry, and e-learning.

Evaluating these qualities against the new job market made me aware that they were all useful attributes.  The engines that would fuel my career path!  So I set off on my journey. I discovered the answer to WHO I AM was inside of me. Doing my homework allowed me to dig deep enough to see where I belonged in the workplace today, and not to be dismayed. I would no longer accept what others perceived as my DREAM JOB.   I was about to embark on my true match!.....End

For my Readers: If you are marooned in a job that you dislike, don't waste another moment being resentful.  Get out your notepad and make your list. Be honest about your skill set. Obtain the skills you need to get the type of job you really want. DON'T LET YOUR AGE BE A FACTOR.  We are sometimes the best version of ourselves due to our age and wisdom! Good luck on your search!!

P.S. I am currently enrolled in an online course to increase my skill level for better job marketability!!

Aniyah AKA The MommySavior

Appreciate every moment by giving thanks every day!

Why Black women are Underpaid

 

Lowballed at work

As I sat in a hefty office chair opposite the privileged thirty something executive, I wondered why she sat in that seat instead of myself.  I figured she probably worked hard through college and earned it, however my gut told me that she hadn't paid her dues.  As I listened to the words come out of her mouth I knew that she didn't share my experiences, therefore she couldn't relate. 

Her seat was prompt up high as she put her hands on the cherry wood desk, which luminated her freshly manicured nails that housed her 1.5 brilliant diamond ring.  Alongside her chair was her Hermes tote, which carried the keys to her Benz.  Yes she had a privileged life, but was oblivious to her reality. 

My reality was that of an arduous three hour round trip daily commute to the affluent city where my employment was based. I was forced to live on the outskirts of the mainland due to increased housing cost. My practicality just couldn't justify putting a significant portion of my income on rent. My plans were to  strategically secure a mortgage on a big beautiful home someday soon. 

Future Plans

Unfortunately my plans came to a halt when she apathetically stated "WE AREN'T GIVING RISES OR PROMOTIONS AT THIS TIME". That was easy for her to digest because she already had a plush lifestyle. My goals were dependent on our regular annual reviews, which included rises.  After leaving her office and digging a little; I discovered that not only was I not going to receive my increase, but that I was amongst a group whom fallen on the lower income tier in the company! 

Bitter Revelation 

Dispute my diligence during my three years of employment, I was paid exceedingly less than my male counterparts. Ironically, some of whom I trained during their onboarding process! I asked myself how this could have happened to me?  I thought: "I'm smart, skilled with a college degree. This should put me in the upper tier of salaries". 

The real question is why America feels justified with this biased type of employment practice that has existed for ages!

Being a black woman in America means that we encompass many layers, assumptions, and misconceptions, and marginalization.  Many of our white companions can't handle our candor on the black experience, and some won't understand our plight. We haven't volunteered for this role. We were born into it. Wearing the hat will mean that we will be subjected to America's conjectures of  who we are.   

With these conclusions,  America will draw up expectations for us:

-The type of neighborhood we are accustomed to

-The type of car we will drive

-The type of food we should eat 

-The type of mate we should choose

-The number of kids we will have

***The type of job and income we should settle for ***

All of the above decisions will be made for us (based on stereotypes); unless we elect to break the status quo.  It will be up to us if we want to subscribe to what scraps America is willing to give us!

Here are some statistics for us to ponder:

-Black women make up 7 percent of the population in the US workforce. 

-Black women are paid 38 percent less than white men

-White women make 21 percent more than black women

-80 percent of black women are sole or co-primary breadwinners in their households

Looking Ahead

These staggering statistics probably don't draw up alarms for any of us. These are well known statistics. Something that we have been facing for decades.  This is why I fell victim to the salary disparity.  None of us are immune to this. 

America, the country our ancestors were delivered to under severe protest.  America, the land that promises freedom, democracy, and equality had fallen short on their promise, and as a result my afro-sisters and I have suffered.  

It's perplexing how a land with such wealth and resources falls short on providing for it's own citizens.  Should we attribute that the gap in income is due to capitalism, competition, or simply greed?  My vote is that it is the latter. 

There is plenty of abundance in our land, it's time for us to get a bigger piece of the pie.  We can do this by knowing our worth.  I suggest doing our homework before we accept a job offer:

-Knowing our market value

-Negotiating our salary

-Thinking ahead: will this income support my lifestyle?  

-What type of salary do I need to make?

-What type of job/career is a good match for me?

-What courses can I take to update my skills?

-How can I start my own business? 

These are vital questions that we must challenge ourselves with.  Despite our efforts, we may not see the top of the glass ceiling, but at least we will have a clearer view!!!!

Note: Take an honest evaluation of yourself.  If you want more than be willing to put in more. Hone in on your natural talents by researching how to formulate a career based on what you already have.  Be willing to take a refresher course to update your skills, go back to college and finish your degree, or change your original major.  Remember, it's never too late.   Age is just a number!!.. 

"Leave your mark on this earth.. Let them know you were here by making an impact on the lives around you by whatever means!" Aniyah

Anita Moffett... AKA Aniyah- The Mommy Savior!

 My path and journey is endless!

P.S. Please leave your comments so that I can continue to get feedback and bring you more REAL stories!